Citizen Mom

JERSEY SNORE: Snooki's Not Even A Ham Worth Fighting For

Sub-plot of last week's Mad Men episode: Peggy and Pete cook up a scheme to build publicity for Sugarberry hams by hiring two broads to get in a fight over one in a store. The subsequent buzz results in a new slogan: "Our hams are worth fighting for."

My biggest criticism of Snooki and her ham-glazed friends isn't about what they've (allegedly) done to our media culture, or their insult-by-example adherence to some notion of what it means to be "Italian," or the astounding vapidity of GTL as a lifestyle ethos. 

What kills me is how shockingly unoriginal the whole thing is.

It's as if bimbettes with a day drunk on don't annoy beach patrons every day somewhere along the Shore. Or as if some of those dumb skanks don't then sassmouth the cops to the point that they get tossed into the back of the car. It's called Senior Week, people, and it's been wasting police resources at the Shore for decades, only those girls usually come away with it with a "walking ticket" court summons and a hangover. For the Snookis of this world, it's a career highlight.

Our response to it all -- round after round of phony shock and indignation, followed by hilariously unironic examinations of our collective cultural conscience -- are re-runs of a re-run at this point, "scandals" that once may have really revealed something about ourselves but are now just on endless repeat in syndication. Even the "Free Snooki" T-shirt that magically appeared on the other cast member who went to fetch Snooki from the police station seemed like a cheap Boardwalk knockoff of a joke that was sort-of funny a decade ago.

RELATED: Seaside Cashes In, or, Bankruptcy and Porn!

Famous Frank Unplugs From Comcast

I'm happy to be among the people in the Philly area who got to know Frank Eliason a little bit while he was doing the whole @comcastcares thing, and am thrilled to wish him well as he leaves for a new job at Citigroup.

Here are some notes I made about Frank not long after we met for a long lunch interview in Comcast's great lunchroom in the clouds. (They were part of a story pitch which, sadly, didn't sell. Probably would have been better on the blog in the first place, but anyway):

 * @Comcastcares: About 5,700 followers in January ['09] to more than 32,000 right now [Oct. '09] [to 44,700 today]
    * Went from one guy and a Tweet to a team of a dozen staffers who field customer service issues, @comcastcares is fast becoming the go-to case study on good social media business practice;
    * Most recently, Brian Roberts' praise of Eliason as "Famous Frank," the man who "changed the culture of our company," is about to make him a big star. He won't be around here too much longer. He's going national, taping interviews, flying out to preach the @comcastcares model at conferences etc.

* There's a compelling personal backstory: Eliason's first encounters with social media came in 2000, when a joyful proud-Dad blog he started for the birth of his first child became a place of shared public grief when the child was born premature and later died of cancer. http://www.sitedreamer.com/gia/ and http://www.eliasonfamily.info/Eliason_Family/Welcome.html

* He and his wife have since welcomed two daughters, and Eliason says he learned through the blogging about the individual-communal experience the internet allows.

* Eliason is accessible and chatty in his Tweets and more importantly, the actual customer-service follow-through is there. Like, it's not just cutesy: There's a whole team of folks from Comcast (Bonnie, etc.) on Twitter not only responding to complaints directed at them, but using search tools to seek out the people who are bitching into the Twitter wind, and try to get their problems fixed. 

As for Frank, he's just a cool and interesting guy, a young working Dad without a fancypants degree who seems to have stepped right onto the pulse point of something big. In conversation with me he called his own story a "Social Media Fairytale," and it really is. 

Nearly a year later, you can't swing a dead cat on Twitter without hitting a job listing for a "social media manager" from a company that essentially wants someone to do what @comcastcares did, even if they can't exactly explain what that is.

I'm coming up on three years on Twitter, and from what I can see of the Philly-area Twitterverse, folks describing themselves as social media experts, mavens, rock stars etc. are a dime a dozen. Guys who have actually used social media to do something quantifiable? Precious few.

Frank Eliason is one.

(Annie Heckenberger is another, but that's a post for another day.)

There's a farewell video from Comcast folks here, worth watching to the end to see Ralph Roberts' undoubtedly hand-tied bowtie. Adorbs!

When I'm Out On The Springstreets Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

via youngjerks.com

A big hat tip to my Twitter pals at the Rowan U. Bio Geospatial Research Lab (aka @RowanGeoLab) for today's Jersey Moment.

Take a gander at Springstreets, "A map of New Jersey based solely on Bruce Springsteen lyrics."

Like woah, Boss.

Careful, though, it comes with a warning: 

SPRINGSTREETS IS NOT TO SCALE AND SHOULD NOT BE USED ON A DRIVE, LAST CHANCE POWER OR OTHERWISE. THE ONLY THING YOU CAN REALLY USE THIS MAP TO FIND IS YOURSELF.

Obviously, I must have this like right this very minute. I shall frame it and hang it right next to my oversized "Family Tree of Rock" print.

Rowhouse Party

via www.youtube.com

Good times in the 'hood with Free Energy, a Philly band with what is hands-down my record of the summer.
Their album Free Energy (yes, this song's called "Free Energy," too, get over it) contains three nearly perfect power-pop tracks -- the title cut, the XPN darling "Bang Pop," and "Young Hearts," which has this great "Reelin' in the Years" feel to it. Three solid tracks on an album is an embarrassment of riches for too many bands these days (adjust pince nez, launch lecture on Death of the Album).

The whole thing feels very 1981, the song you play on the same jukebox dollar with "Moving in Stereo" and right before "Stop Draggin' My Heart Around." Stick a comb in the back pocket of your jeans and let's do this thing.

What The Soldiers Saw

No, this isn't a post about the Wikileaks Afghanistan war logs, sorry. But on this day where everyone's discussing first-hand accounts of war, I wanted to hip you to a really interesting and beautiful exhibition coming to the National Constitution Center in the Fall.

I HIGHLY recommend watching the promo video on The Art of the American Soldier, part of  "the most famous collection nobody's ever heard of."

The U.S. Army is putting a small selection of its massive storehouse of soldier-created art work on display for the first time ever. I saw a feature on this collection on TV a few months back (thought it was CBS Sunday Morning but I must be wrong, I can't find a clip), and I've been eagerly waiting for a road show of some kind. I think it says good things about the Constitution Center that it was chosen for this event, too.

"WASHINGTON (Army News Service, July 23, 2010) -- The public will get a chance to see for the first time more than 250 paintings and sketches of the American Soldier at the National Constitution Center in Philadelphia Sept. 24 through Jan. 10.

Representative of a 15,000-piece collection created by more than 1,300 Soldier-artists, including never-before-seen artwork has been in storage in Washington since the start of the Army's art program in World War I. The exhibit will explore how Soldier-artists saw Army life, from trench warfare terror in 1918 to USO shows, field training to simple daily life like a morning shave in the Middle East. Mediums range from etchings, pen and ink, pencil, watercolor, charcoal as well as oil and acrylic paints." 

 

To go along with the exhibition, the Constitution Center has also launched an online gallery, where active or retired personnel from any branch of service can share their own art reflecting their military experience. Visitors to the Center will be able to view the art at a digital kiosk within the Art of the American Soldier exhibition.

We Splishy-Splashy For An Hour Or Two

via www.youtube.com

"I roll hard in the yard with my 60-inch cut."
DEAD

"The Dad Life," by Church On The Move Tulsa. Their "Night Before Christmas" reading is also kid-friendly and fun.

Like 'Deliverance' in Mom Jeans

Sarah Palin is reported to be joining Kate Gosselin and her brood on a camping trip in Alaska, part of what will surely be a very "special" episode of Kate Plus 8.

Ahh, I can see it now, the two fiesty moms kicking back by the campfire, swapping nips on a thermos full of white zinfandel, trading tips on how best to make money off of one's children.

Sarah can offer some BTDT war stories about important child-rearing topics like brand management, and Kate can school the ex-gov on how to field dress an unruly husband. Then, Clinton and Stacy will emerge from the bushes and give the Moms a backwoods style makeover while the Gosselin kids go on a root n' berry hike.

I guess Nadia Suleman was busy that weekend?

From HuffPo, via @heldincontempt.

Peaches, and peaches

Two wildly unrelated things about the velveteen fruit today:

First, the New Jersey peaches are in full flush now, and with more than 100 varieties grown here, there's plenty to keep you cooking, canning and cobblering for weeks. This tree was picked this afternoon, a few hours after I snapped this.

 

This Sunday, you can feast on some peaches in their own neighborhood, at blueplate's Dinner in the Orchard event at Holtzhauser's farm here in Mullica Hill. Chef Jim's peach-centric menu will feature Flaming Fury and white donut varieties. Can I get a Yum? Yes, yes I can.

Regarding a peach of a very different kind: After much consideration, I've decided that the evolutionary point at which Lady Gaga went from Stefani Germanotta, dark-haired piano songstress, to platinum blond art freak had to come sometime during Peaches' 2006 tour.

Here's my report on Peaches' Nov. 25, 2006 show, from Phawker:

It warmed the cockles of me heart to see the way Peaches worked the Troc crowd into a sweaty horndog mess. It’s good for the kids to try new things.

She’s got a guitar stance like Gene Simmons, wide-legged and cocky, setting forth on the “Teaches of Peaches,” scaling the speakers and lap-dancing a few stoners up in the balcony. That was cool, but nothing I haven’t seen before. Where Peaches made me her bitch was when they brought out the bike — one of those ’70s chumpies with the banana seat and the big U-shaped handlebars. So hot.

Sounds a lot like a Lady Gaga thing, no? Well, it looked a lot like one, too, right down to the spewing blood. I'm not hating, I just think it's important to remember that before GaGa was bluffin' with her muffin, we were impeaching someone's bush. Like the song says, the girls wanna be her. (Video probably NSFW)

Peaches, "Boys Wanna Be Her"